Here is the feedback that my teacher gave me on my film pitch.
Y13 Film pitch
Presentation Feedback
You presented very clearly although a little speedly. Stand whilst you present, as it is more formal and you can move around making eye contact with the audience so they know you are speaking to all of them. Also try to not read from the slides, cue card will help you do this.
What you need to do
Work your way through this feedback and using the guidance hand out. The extra inclusion of sound/music you would use is an excellent addition to the pitch.
After I read the feedback I decided to add/ change my original film pitch instead of re creating a new one.
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